Why is THIS news?

First off, I’d like to take my hat off and give a giant bow of respect to the FBI and the NYPD. They went from abandoned, smoking vehicle in Times Square to a viable suspect in custody in a little over 48 hours. THAT, is police work. THAT was news.

Ok then, back to the matter at hand. I’ve been annoyed (more so than usual) by the things I hear in the news that make me go: “Why is THIS news?”

1. People coming out of the closet.
I honestly cannot give a flying fuck something that flies, if you’ve spent the last decades closeted. Really, Ricky Martin, I don’t give a shit. That’s like hearing: “Ending years of speculation, Angelina Jolie has issued a press release confirming, that she is in fact, a Gemini.”
Or “Hugh Hefner is straight.” Let’s be honest here, does it really make a difference? There is some country singer girl that came out this week, and honestly, I left NPR because I just didn’t want to hear it.

2. China.
This is not a joke. I am so tired of hearing in the news about every time China farts. Don’t misunderstand me; I am not one of those crazy isolationists that think “America don’t need nobody.” Far from it. I’ll show you my passport for proof. I love learning and hearing about other cultures, but NPR reports more on china than on our stuff (or so it seems). There was new report about some Chinese man that died. He knew how to make bird noises with his throat. I heard about it on NPR. I. shit. you. not. He wasn’t somebody that helped mankind in some way, nor a civil servant dying to save another, or something else that should merit mention. If this is how the rest of the world reports or reported on the U.S. in their own countries, I can see why American’s don’t tend to bode well in international circles.

3. The World’s Fair.
See China. But also, it’s irrelevant now. The World’s fair had its place in a time when countries needed a means to exchange ideas and impress upon other nations their technological knowhow. And it was a great idea and successful way of doing so. And then came telecommunications, and ultimately the internet. What the hell do I need a world’s fair when I can teleconference and see, SEE your demo from miles away? Call it another conference and move on. Dragon Con needs some competition, maybe the “World’s Con” is up to the challenge. Oh, and don’t let me go without saying that the amount of money spent on this thing is an absurdity the size of the cosmos itself. I mean, dear God (atheist, remember?) there are people literally DYING in Haiti, Chile, Nashville, and many other places. There is giant fucking oil leak just off the coast of Louisiana, but let’s put on a show measured in billions of dollars so that the world notices us. It’s like a little girl whining “pay attention to meeee”… Good job, we noticed.

Sorry for the long post. I know it’s out of character, but just felt bitchy for some reason. I know, try to contain the gasp. Let’s see if the media reports on this as well. Where is Chuck Norris when you need him to roundhouse kick some people?

Caged Tigers

I got nothing though I felt obligated to write something. My prickling fingertips told me so, as did the voices that rummage in my head from time to time (a lot of times). But we won’t get into that subject, my mother always said to never speak of them. EVER!

Today is supposed to be the beer festival in Atlanta. I was looking forward to taking my kids to their mother’s house for the weekend, and proceeding to allow the shitfacedness to ensue. Alas, it is not to be. You see, the festival is in the open streets of East Atlanta, but today the sky weeps. There is even a chance of a thunderstorm or two sweeping by. Bad enough to have drunks on the street, but to have drunks on the wet, rainy road, ehh… no gracias. You have no idea how retarded people get when it rains in this city. You'd think they got gassed or something.

Its' not that I hate the rain, hell, without it most people don’t know how strike up conversation. It’s just that it’s been raining for two weeks already. We are starting to feel and sound a lot like caged tigers: A lot of pacing, roaring, and clawing at one another. Its getting ugly. Wish me luck, but above all, wish me beer.