Darth Query: How did this work?

Seeing some of the stories that have become American classics, I got to thinking (yes, it DOES happen) what the queries must have looked like. Here is the best my [currently] inebriated brain could come up with. It needs no introduction, but perhaps only a little Query Shark help:

When Luke, a young farmer on the planet Tatooine, receives a message from a droid he recently acquired, he is thrust in the middle of an intergalactic war that has been waging for generations. With a guidance of an old hermit, strong in a force called, the force, Luke embarks in an adventure that will take him from the desolate deserts of his home world, to the desolate nomad spaceships of the interstellar rebellion. In a battle for the freedom of the oppressed people of the empire, Luke must battle an evil dark lord for the salvation of the known galaxy. Darth Vader, the dark lord of the evil galactic empire, maintains a tight grip and control of the multiple planetary systems in his realm, extending his fiendish rule over land and space.

In Han Solo, an intergalactic smuggler, Luke finds an unlikely ally in his fight against the tyrannical forces of Darth Vader and the empire. Together, with Obi-wan, the mystical hermit, they must find a way to destroy the ultimate weapon of submission. The Death Star. A moon size base that wobbles at less than impressive speeds toward unsuspecting planets and possesses enough firepower to destroy an entire world with a scientifically improbable death ray. In his journey Luke forges alliances that can help him become the new master of the unequivocally named “force” or perish in his attempt to destroy the forces of evil. Filled with teenage angst and a hint of incest, Star Wars is a 175,000 words, complete science fiction novel, ready to be submitted for your review.

Thank you, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Jorge Lucas