4.22.2010

Awesome, is made of Chuck Norris:

4.22.2010
I'm having the kind of day that needs a little sunshine. And who better to provide it, than Chuck Norris. Bow, infidels!

Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two"

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.

When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.


These are only a small sample.. feel free to add.

10 comments:

SJDuvall

Haha, I needed a laugh too. I especially love the devil one.

Cheree

LOL, I used to love Chuck Norris films and just between us, I still watch Walker Texas Ranger whenever the reruns are on.

KLM

Physicists currently conducting research with the Hadron Super Collider in Europe are currently circulating a petition within CERN to rename the Higgs boson -- aka the God particle --the Chuck Norris particle.

Summer

There are only 2 things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds and Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

Jm Diaz

The devil one is awesome.. that one made laugh pretty hard.

Nothing wrong with that, Cheree... I will alway Lone Wolf McNorris (it seems like a better fitting name).

KLM, The physicists don't know yet, becasue only God knows, that the Higgs Boson, is a quantum version of Chuck Norris. Always has been, always will.

Summer = You rock! :D Those made me squirt coffee out of my nose. Especially, the last one.

Amber Tidd Murphy

Chuck Norris started the second ice age by eating a York Peppermint Patty.

Tina Lynn

Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin under his beard. He has another fist.

T.J. Carson

Ha ok Mr. Chuck Norris, there is a blog award for you over on my page if you are interested! :)

Sierra Godfrey

Chuck Norris at the Icelandic volcano and then burped, causing all of Europe to shut down?

KarenG

Chuck Norris jokes are awesome! These were so funny! Sorry I can't top any of them.

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